gawd, it was soooo hard to be changing your sims every now and then. I so need a new phone soon, and i’m thinking whether to ge a nice one like something from the Nokia Eseries worth 12k and up or that Nokia expressmusic touchscreen worth 10k, or get anything at 2k max.
Nokia E63
or
Nokia 5530 expressmusic
the dilemma is that i easliy lose my phones or i break them. now, do i get a nice phone or just get one for the function (call and text)? sigh!
He’s such a nice person. i thought he would ask me to do some video or shoot some photos for him but he only asked why i am leaving the bank. i just smiled, and he asked me again where i am going. i told him the company where i am transferring and told him that im on the lookout for new challenges.
he told me he’s going to miss me, that i am always part of the family and that i am always welcome to visit. he told me that i must keep in touch. i thanked him for the very fruitful experience i had with the bank, for all he opportunities it has given me to find myself and understand its advocacy. i was so overwhelmed by the experience that i forgot he’s CEO and i am staff.
Ambassador Jesus P. Tambunting, owner, chairman and CEO of Planters Development Bank, Entrepreneur of the Year Philippines 2009, taught me that a warm smile can touch even the coldest heart. he taught me that humility can take you to places you can’t even imagine. he taught me not to be afraid to speak my mind.
tomorrow would be my last day with the bank. i am thankful for the all the opportunities and the learnings i have gained during my short but fruitful stay. and because of that i don’t want to burn bridges as i move along.
okay, so i waited for this for like a quarter of a year. going through that application process which seemed to have no ending, made me almost give up and stay where i am. in a few days, i’ll have to face a new environment, do another adjustment, keep those bank uniforms and fit my own-styled corporate attire, conquer new challenges.
this decision is a risk. im back to my probationary status, no bonuses and leave credits for the next six months, so im actually terrorizing my tenure. but i believe im also building my career and eventually, my life.
our CEO told me yesterday before i left for home that i should see him. i was wondering if he already knew that I am leaving the bank or there’s something he would ask me to do? sigh! His daughter talked to me already, she wished me good luck and i was really amazed by her charm and humility. I mean, who am i for them anyway? Our CEO is just the 38th richest person in the country according to Forbes last year. and me, just a plain employee of his bank.
i consider that an achievement though. in his world, where everything happens fast, where everyone is just another face, he somehow remembered the connection of my face to my name. im still wondering what it could be we’ll talk about this afternoon or maybe tomorrow, whenever. i hope i could break the news without assumption. i know they could get another me or maybe someone better in no time.
of course it breaks my heart to leave some people who i considered as friends already. a lot of them have been very supportive of my move right from the start. the excxitement of meeting new people is equally scary. but i guess, that’s how life is, we have to give up good things for something we think will make us better.
i hope one day, i’ll go back to see them again and hear ourselves share sotries of successes and inspiration. 
one is enough
two is too much
and three is poisonous.
this is my philosophy today. i guess i just grew tired of pushing things to its limit. sometimes, way way over the limit for some people i think i have cared so much for. this time, i am more complacent and secured, i love myself more than ever. i learned to appreciate unexpected nice things that were done than sweet sounding promises which are, more often than not, meant to be broken. i realized that some people will just accept you for who you are, love you for whatever you have and will become and a lot will just be there beside you for what you can do for them.
real friendship is hard to find especially in the workplace. gossip is spelled out everywhere, sometimes even the most insane ones suddenly became so easy to believe in. how will people approach you when they have already judged you? the echoing truth is that people will always judge you based on how you look, on how you sound, on what you own, on what they hear inside the elevators. it is unfair, i know, but that is how things are and the process just goes round and round and round. One day, you’ll raise your chin up and would want to prove them wrong, then the next day, you’ll ask yourself why you need to please them after all.
everytime i get into a fight with my friends, it doesn’t matter if im wrong or not. i always take the initiative to say sorry twice, explain my side and then never again for the same issue. i don’t mind the pride thing. it is the least trait that i need. but im not as patient.
i just realized that it is hard to make new friends in the workplace, but even harder to keep old ones. im scared that those people i call friends wont be there when i need them most. i dont want to experience that frustration and so im kinda reserving myself. im not ranting nor raving. im not whining nor sharing what my dreams are. i would not share so much of myself this time. passivity after two tries is what im going to do. i dont want to exert any effort anymore. i grew tired trying to prove myself to people who are not even worth my time.
i got my ankle sprained when i climbed up the island so as to cross the road to get my weiner breakfast at Earle’s. my foot landed in a twisted manner and so the pain started to fill my senses. it hurt too much that i even asked my friend if we could stop for a while even if we’re in a middle of a major road in makati. after a few minutes, i tried to walk, but it was really painful everytime the damaged foot would touch the ground.
because of that, i wasn’t able to go to work today. i was fetched by my mom in my apartment and headed back to bulacan. had it checked and said it needed rest, and just like what my boss said when he called me up this morning.
RICE for a sprained ankle
R-rest
I- ice
C- compress
E- elevate
now, all my appointments were cancelled up to the next couple of days. i hope this gets better by monday. sigh!
While scavenging my stuff in my room this weekend, i found this small notebook which i kept and wrote my thoughts on. This is what i wrote when i was 18. Then i remembered the book 52 projects. It is a list of 52 random stuff you may do for nothing. hahaha. anyways, below is what i wrote.
I’m incomplete though i would like to believe I’m not. I am weak though I would like to believe I am strong. I am the worst but I convince myself I’m perfectly ok and somehow at my best.
I thought it is great to in the pedestal. I thought it would feel so good to be up high. Yes, there’s this joy but with certain sadness. It is a package I guess.
Nothing is really perfect, nothing would ever come in a perfect way. All things come in complication and no success could just be handed in. No turnovers and no exchagne. That is one rule I have learned.
Living on earth for almost 18 years makes me feel anxious. So anxious about what I should do with my stay. I feel that my time is really really short, my life is really really short.
I’m dreaming to become the best just like what everyone wanted. It is hard to fight in a battle if my sword is short and my shield is brittle. It is even harder if the soldier wasn’t trained to endure the pain and hardships.
I’m crying inside, I know, because i failed my family, i failed myself. My tears aren’t enough to ease the pain from the wounds i’ve got from falling. It is so deep that I’m afraid that even time might not be powerful enough to heal it.
But I can’t just cry. I can’t just cry and sit until the battle ends. I couldn’t wait. I have to do something.
I’m so restless. So tired of dealing with the world’s game. Playing it made me stumble and maybe sturdy in some ways. I don’t know what is waiting for me at the end but I’m hoping that it is something I could be proud of.
I’m still far from the nearest possible pit stop. I’m losing grip but I can’t stop. I just can’t give up.
I think I wrote this when i just failed my Math17 (College Algebra and Trigonometry). It was my first time to ever fail a subject my entire life and it really felt like it was the end of everything for me. I think I isolated myself from all my friends and punished myself by doing all the household chores the whole summer. I was that depressed! hahaha. looking back, my Math17 failure somehow made me realize that not all things will come easily for me. I wasn’t a believer of hardwork until that time.
J
due to my incessant breakouts, i decided not to eat oily fatty and sweet foods for the rest of the week. also try to drink lots and lots of water! geesh i wish i could give up the sweet food part! sigh!
i envy the chinese and koreans for having great skin. and also those tan skinned pinays who are shining when the sun strinkes them.
this is insecurity alert!!! geesh
i found this software on the net. and though its just a 30-day trial i kinda loving what it is doing to my photos. hahaha. super easy!
with therese @ baclayon chruch, bohol
@ panglao island, bohol
@ crowne regency plaza for G’s birthday
haha…these were taken at jen’s condo when she decided to sell her clothes before she left for NY.
i found these at quing’s (our photographer) site. geesh i remember how tiring the photoshoot was. with all those preparations and the like…gawd!!! it took us what? 5 long hours??? geesh!!!! so forgive how i looked in some photos…haha
the shoes were modelled by jen because they wont fit me. i did the clothes and the bags…hehehe
link is below
http://quingdom.jalbum.net/Jennifer’s%20Stuff/
